6 Tips to Making Marriage Work After Having Kids

A new year means a new chance to build better habits that will make our relationships stronger. If you’ve been married for quite some time and already have kids, you’re very well familiar with the struggles of staying connected and feeling the “honeymoon” stage. When the baby arrived, everything changed–new routines, new responsibilities and lack of sleep made you a whole different person. How can you continue to keep the marriage alive after all the sleepless night? Here are 6 tips.

Spend quality time with each other

Here is when quality really matters! Especially with a newborn, it is unlikely that parents will have a lot of time alone with each other. For parents of older kids, there are a lot of schoolwork, extra-curricular classes, and events to attend to. Amidst the busy schedules, make sure to set some time with each other. This doesn’t have to be fancy dates or expensive vacations; it can be as simple as taking the same car ride to work or doing errands and chores together.

Make chores fun

No one looks forward to doing chores, but if you put the fun in the chores, it can be enjoyable together. How about some Netflix & Laundry (folding)? Or a grocery date with lunch at the food court after? Sort of like hitting two birds with one stone with this one.

Communicate and appreciate

Do we need to stress this any more? Like in any other relationship, good communication is key. This is even more important in marriage. Talk to your spouse. Do not assume that your spouse can read your mind. Are you too tired to cook breakfast? Say it. Do you need some time for yourself? Ask for it. Do you need help to take care of the kids? Find it. Letting your partner know your needs will make it easier for them, too.

At the same time, do not forget to show your love and appreciation to each other. Say thank you, let them know they are doing a great job! Make it even more creative, like writing notes or surprising your spouse with their favorite coffee or dessert.

Celebrate the little things

We don’t need to wait for the big occasions to celebrate. Maybe you’re finally done with potty-training, or finally got 8 hours of sleep again – who says it’s not enough to celebrate? Reward yourself with some ice cream or pizza, whatever you like works too!

Get that village

They say it takes a village to raise children. Go get that village to help you out if you need to. You might be surprised at how willing people are to help you out if you ask them to! Reach out to family and friends if you are feeling overwhelmed, need help or just need someone to watch over the kids while you have a night out. Ask your pediatricians for advice if you are worried about your kids’ health and development. Talk to your child’s teacher to understand how your child is doing in school.

Remember, you’re in this together

Having a spouse means having a partner in this parenting thing. We hope these tips can help and inspire you to think of other ways you can keep your marriage alive and happy!


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